None like you.

Happy Birthday, FY!

It’s this time of the year again. Ever since we got to know each other from secondary 2, this day has always been a special one because it’s your birthday!

I won’t deny this, but as the days draw close to 26th April each year, I do get a little flustered. But I’m saying this in a good way because I’m not complaining. I’d gladly be that flustered each year as I go about thinking of what I’d like to do for you because I want to. And I always always have that happy feeling as I go about what I do. It’s a nice feeling.

I won’t be saying much here but anyway, I can’t wait to see you later when I end work and when you end school. This is exciting because I haven’t got to see you much this year at all. I hope both our days go well and I have so much more I’d like to say to you.

This will be another beautiful day in April hehe and I am so very thankful for you, a friend like no other, or rather the sister I never had.

 

The wish at the wishing well

Happpppppy Birthday, Chinghwee!

Though I have this feeling he won’t see this, I’ll still be leaving this here. I still feel just as awful from the day he told me that his course starts again on the 17th of April because I thought of spending the 18th with him. So now he’s back in camp for stay in and I have to deal with it.

Things have been different when it comes to Chinghwee. I don’t know how to explain it. But I just feel the need to thank him for many things. Things that enlighten me especially. And for always always always being able to make me laugh and feel better after a day of crap. I still remember the first time I was so frustrated at work that I let out an overwhelming verbal diarrhoea he didn’t see coming. Remembering how he reacted is funny now. And from that memory, I remember so many other things but I guess attempting to even list them out here is crazy.

All in all, I just hope all goes well for him as he goes through course again, be it for training, studying, deployment, everything.

20 is a big number leh, hahaha.
Whatever the case, today shall be a beautiful day!

 

Birthdays, just days to the family.

Happpy Birthday, Brother!
And he turns 21.

It’s funny. I find it weird to say Happy Birthday to anyone in my family. Have never said it face to face to my mom nor my brother.
I don’t really get why it actually feels, hmmm, uncomfortable to wish them happy birthday.
It’s just like how it’s difficult to say “I love you” to my mom or even “I’m sorry”.

Recently, my brother and I have been talking a lot more. And I guess I like it this way.
The house doesn’t seem as foreign as it would have been.
And you know, there’s someone to talk to and laugh with.
We say so many nonsense things and talk about things that may probably be unspoken out of this house.
I actually have fun saying “Lame” in a certain tone to my brother hahahaha.

Thankful to have an older brother such as him.
Though we have the days of ‘bully’, cold wars etc.
I still choose to be thankful. :)

 

I’m just afraid most of the times I’m not grounded to reality.

(I read through the post and my sentences don’t seem to fit right rawr but I don’t feel like editing the entire thing so yeah. Ahhh.)

It’s been a well, partially alright day I guess.
I just wished today was still Friday.

Came home and my parents have added blinds to my windows!
Hopefully this means more open-curtain days since the sun wouldn’t be too glaring and my room wouldn’t be too bright.
I think I blogged about my curtains before.
I don’t remember what I’ve said previously but I must have mentioned that my curtains are never open.
At the moment, I don’t know if I like opening the curtains.
But I think I’ll try to leave them open more often now.
Don’t want to waste the effort my parents put into fixing the blinds meticulously.

Here’s a peek hehe.

And then there was that day where the girls went out to celebrate double birthdays.
Well there were those ‘how-how-how’ moments but it all went well I’d say.
We’ve never gone out together like that before.
It’s good to see everyone together again.
Reminds me a lot of last year. :’)

Oh yes AND THEN THE CALL.
But I’m not going to talk about it here.
I will always remember Jiahui giving me The-Look, hahaha.

Thennnn, today was Saints Fest + Open house.
School was awfully crowded it was difficult to walk.
Don’t like it when people don’t know how to move to let people walk.
But I guess sometimes we’re just unaware.

Spent the time mostly with Sharlyn and Yuanyee.
Gotta really thank Yuanyee for running out with the balloon.
I thought they would just let me say no when I started making my way across the bridge and back to the mrt.

Nothing in school really appealed to me though.
And haunted house sounded like fun but well, acl has no guts hahaha.
I just wanted to watch people get scared but the windows had to be covered.

It’s funny how the pictures we take all feel awkward.
I honestly don’t know why.
Especially the first polaroid I took with Sharlyn.
Hahaha, will never forget how silly we looked standing the same way.

I hope the rest of today turns out good.
Currently I’m a bit ~-ish.
Hmmmmm.

 

Burnt

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MUMMY!

Probably won’t see her today.
I left school too early and she wasn’t awake yet.
Then she’s working till late and I’ll probably be asleep by the time she’s back home.

There’re so many things in my head.
And syf.. Ahhhhh.

I wished my mummy happy birthday through a text this morning.
I was quite sad when she told me that she thought I had forgotten it was her birthday.
But her texts made me smile.
I apologised for not being able to get her a gift and then she again said, “No need present, you have to be a good girl and do your studies well that is the best present to me.”
This isn’t the first time she has told me this and each time she does it makes me tear.
Then I start to feel so much pressure, and I feel the loads on my shoulders growing heavier.
I don’t know if I can be you know, good enough.

Okay, I’m very tired I want to just drop and die.
Yet I can’t sleep now because I might not wake up till tomorrow morning.
Or I’ll wake up too early and won’t be able to get back to sleep.

How now, what should I do?
And I’m so sad, I wish I had a more complete previous post. :(

 

I don’t mind being an Elephant heehee.

The past two days have been really lovely.
My friends are so sweet, so fantastic. :D

It all started out on Friday.
The day I ponned my first lecture, hahaha, but I’m not complaining!
Partially sneaked into ‘No strings attached’ at GV plaza after school.
Partially because I think they’ll let me in if I’m just 1 day away from being 18.
But my friends sure had their way into getting everyone a ticket hehe.
Anyway, they really planned something, and I was really touched and grateful.
They tried to trick me up till the end lor!
Remember Natasha saying, “Aiyo, what are they doing?” before everything happened.
But they’re all really just so sweet.
I’m thankful. :D
I’ll always remember all that happened at the corner of that Starbucks.

Then Saturday came and my choir friends all made the full day of choir a lot more bearable.
Thankful for the hugs.
Everyone burst out singing at the caf and they didn’t let me run away rawr.
But the sound resonated in the caf, sounded so beautiful, and it made me really happy.
I can still remember how awkward it felt to be the only girl wanting to play basketball.
It’s interesting to watch the guys play though so not bad. :B

Spent the rest of the day with FYYYYY!

I love the sunflower, I named it Pretty because it’s so pretty. :D
Talked about anything and everything.
Was so happy to be able to see FY again and to spend 26th with her.
Hi FY, you’re waaaawesome and I can’t be more thankful for you, and for everything you’ve done for me. <3

I was really disappointed with myself when I didn’t manage to thank everyone by night time because I fell asleep.
But I’d still like to thank everyone who made my birthday so special, who were so lovely and who I’m really thankful for.
Thanks for the gifts, surprise, card, songs, greetings, flower and most importantly, thank you for you!

Thanks for being part of my day!

Love all of you! <3

 

With much love

Had dinner with my family and relatives over at East Coast.
We did the same 5 years ago too, when my aunt was over.
It’s only when aunt’s with us that grandma would be willing to come over and have seafood for dinner.
When aunt’s not back for Chinese New Year, my grandma would also say we should not waste money on the seafood and refuse when we ask her about it.

This year was a little special though, because we celebrated grandma’s birthday.
This could even be the first time she celebrated her birthday.

My family doesn’t celebrate birthdays.
Neither of us celebrate our birthdays.
Maybe when I was still a toddler, and my brother.
Then my parents would buy a birthday cake and light the candles.
I don’t have any memory of those, just pictures.
We usually just say Happy Birthday and maybe get the person something.
That’s the norm.
And if you go just a little above the norm, my heart can’t take it, and I’d feel like crying because I’m touched.

Aunt bought a cake and we celebrated grandma’s 78th birthday.
I wonder how she feels, you know, being the only one in her generation that’s still all out and working.
I think work is the thing that keeps her going.

Half way through the birthday song, I paused because I felt like crying.
(I don’t understand why I cry so easily, sometimes it’s a problem.)
But I didn’t allow myself to since it was a happy occasion.
So I stoned my heart for a moment to continue with the birthday song.

I hope Grandma was happy.
Here’s grandma!

Happy birthday to you,
Happy birthday to you,
Happy birthday to ah ma,
Happy birthday to you!

I love my grandma.
Though I don’t go to her house each week as much as my brother does, I still love my grandma.
She’s so admirable, sigh.

I hope she knows that I love her.

 

A pretty morning

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, CLARICE!

 

Find your way back to love

Today’s my Father’s birthday.
And it feels weird.
I have never had the habit of wishing him Happy Birthday, nor getting him a gift.
When I was much younger, I used to send him a text saying “Happy Birthday.”
That was when I was still really afraid of him.
Now I don’t feel that fear, and it’s more comfortable, but I don’t wish him either.
I would silently.
But you know, yeah I don’t know.
Ah.

 

The familiar silhouette

Only when I left school did I notice how bad the haze has become.
According to CNA, from a PSI of 56 at 16:00, it shot up to 83 at 19:00.
At first when I saw the state of the haze, I thought it was quite cool. (I don’t know why).
But after awhile, it wasn’t so cool anymore.
The air was awful.

Anyway, as usual PW and Chinese leaves me exhausted. :(
I don’t like the worn-out feeling.
I feel like I’m gradually stretching myself dry.
I’ve been sleeping more (from the accidental KOs), but I’m still as tired everyday.

Rawr.

Oh oh oh yes,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, LETISHA!

 

I wanna watch the fireworks

I appreciate ndp.
I think everyone should too.

Happy Birthday, Singapore!

 

I owe you everything.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MUMMY!
I hope deep inside you know, that you are the best Mom I could ever ask for.

 

Love will make it alright.

Here’s something for FY, this special special day.
I couldn’t have much time for it, but nonetheless, I hope you’ll like it.
It has what I want to say.
HAPPPPPPPPPY BIRTHDAY! :D

There’s this sudden joy diffusing through me.
Do you feel it too?
Woah, the wonders of special days. :D